Hindsight and regret

A few weeks ago I noticed that the youngest brother of a family I used to be very friendly with, was on facebook. I had known them since I was twelve and the eldest son was best man at my first wedding and I was best man at his. Another brother, John, became a good friend as we got older and his elder brother went off to university. John and I had similar personalities, both opinionated and smart arses and we argued as much as got on over all manner of trivia. We were both overly sarcastic at times but we had a real friendship.

John queued for tickets for us to see Led Zeppelin whilst I provided the transport. We went to see King Crimson. I dragged him to see Budgie and he blackmailed me into a Trapeze concert. A group of us Island Hopped around Greece in the late seventies and he dragged us along on two skiing holidays with a group of his adrenalin junkie friends. As we got older, we drifted as we all had jobs in different parts of the country. I divorced with the usual acrimony that entails and we lost touch. I built a new life with new friends. Over the years, I'd hear snippets about them from mutual acquaintances or from my sisters bumping into their parents. I was told I should call and see their Mum and Dad but didn't.

Rather bizarrely, over the last six months, I began having dreams about my old friend David. I say bizarre as he still looked 30 and, in my dreams was a complete bastard. He is anything but. I began to think that it would be good to get in touch but, apprehension ruled. I couldn't help thinking that perhaps, all we would have in common is the past.

As I said at the start, the chance to communicate presented itself and I took it. Three weeks ago, John was killed in a mountain bike accident. He was 59 and still an adrenaline junkie. All being well, I will be meeting all these people next Monday, at his funeral. I cannot think of worse circumstances.

A saying you so often hear is "It's never too late". Sometimes it is.