A little doubt goes a long way.

One of my favourite ever Tweeters is post op following cancer surgery. I am sure she has gone through every emotion in the book and she now has the waiting game which, sadly, sometimes never ends. I hope to hear soon she is well on the way to recovery.

I was very blasé about my own condition. I didn't take it seriously right up to surgery which my better half often found both annoying and baffling. It is always more difficult for the people who love you. They never know if they are saying or doing the right thing. I made a joke of it. I still do. It wasn't a veneer to cover fear or anything approaching it. It was just the way I am.

One thing does change though. You only need a fraction of a percentage of doubt about the success of the treatment to enable less than positive thoughts to surface. For instance. I have eczema. I've had it, on and off, for most of my life. When it flares I use various prescribed creams and it usually disappears, only to reappear elsewhere. The most annoying was on my bollocks when I was a kid. It was worse for my dad who took me to the Doctors and was so embarrassed at having to explain where it was to him. I seem to remember "penny" being used. How quaint. I'd have said bollocks in his position.

Anyway, I have a patch on my leg that will not respond to any treatment. It sometimes seems to glow in the dark and itches like buggery (so I'm told). It is eczema I am sure but....

I need some dental work done. I went to the surgery two weeks ago and the hygienist was concerned with a white patch on the roof of my mouth. She wanted a second opinion and I booked in again. I had to wait two weeks. That fraction of a percent kicked in again. I read the John Diamond book a few years ago and decided that was one way I didn't want to go. I actually dreamt, the following night, that I had mouth cancer. It was a relief to wake up. I have since had the all clear. Whatever it was has gone. No doubt there will be other issues from time to time. It doesn't bother or worry me. At least, I am 99.9999999% sure it doesn't.